Over the years of being with someone for so long you tend to forget about the simple joys of the relationship. Not sure what I'm talking about? I'm talking about the tender kiss placed on the forehead at the perfect moment. That welcomed but yet unexpected hug around your waist when you are not paying attention. The cuddling on the couch while watching a movie or a tv show. Holding hands while in public. Just letting them/her know how special they are.
We become to complacent in the relationship that we slowly stop doing the above mentioned things. The list can go on and on of the little but important actions that we forget to do. To me all of what we forget is what keeps the spark going. Letting them know how much they mean to you out of the blue. Letting them/her know how beautiful/handsome they are. Telling him/her how beautiful you see them without words but with the look in your eyes.
I've realized all of this since I moved out here to WA. I have had time to reflect on the relationship/marriage that I had. I realized that we stopped the cuddling, the hand holding and all the small things that make a womans heart (at least mine) pitter patter or make you feel those high school butterflies. We became complacent in our relationship/marriage and routine took over. There's nothing wrong with routine but still keep the spark going!
What female doesn't want to feel special? To see the look in your boyfriend/spouse/partner's eye know that they only have eyes for you and no one else could take that stare away is what everyone wants in a relationship. To have that and to be able to keep it would be awesome. To those who do have all this and more I think it's just amazing!
Relationships and marriages are a job on their own. If you don't work at it, it won't last. Each person needs to put everything into it. You can't have one person who is putting in 100% and the other only 50%. Both people need to put the same amount into it for it to be successful.
Since my situation I have be able to talk to Chuck's cousin a lot. She is an amazing person and her outlook on life and marriage are just as amazing! Happiness- it comes and it goes. It's something that needs to be worked on in a marriage or a serious realtionship. You need to make yourself happy. If something is making you unhappy address the issue. To make it work both need to put in the same amount of effort.
So I got off track for this post, lol. Go figure I went off and couldn't stop typing. My point is that I want to feel those butterflies in my belly all the time!! I want to know and feel that I am the only one that that person wants to be with. But I also want the person I am with to feel the same. I want to be able to trust the person I am with. To know that they won't crush my heart. My heart has been crushed one to many times. This last time almost completely destroyed me. I want to feel safe in someone's arms again. I want to love and be loved again. Not to worry if I am making the person happy because I will just know by the site of him and his presence that I make him 100% happy.
Have I experienced the gittiness of the butterflies in my belly? Yes! Of course I have! Do I miss it? Hell Yes I miss it! I have been told that I am beautiful when I felt like I looked liked crap. I have experienced so much and realized how much I have missed it all. Also I realized how much of all this lacked in my marriage. Having the spark and working on making yourself happy is what will keep your relationship strong. Don't give up! Work on it! It's a commitment. Don't just throw it to the side like it's a piece of trash! Remember whether you know it or not you have somes delicate heart in your hands! Take care of it the person seriously trusts you enough for you to hold it so hold it gently. If you have to let the heart go do it ever so gently as well. Don't just go up to them and be like see your heart in my hands? Now see me crush it! It's not cool! Trust Me that happened to me and its not the greatest feeling at all. I almost didnt make this last heart crushing that was handed to me.
Well I am ending this post. If you read this, awesome. Remember these are my own ramblings and thoughts that I have put down. You may not agree with what I say and you may who knows. They may have made sense and they may have not made sense. My thoughts! Til next time.
Tuesday, August 16, 2011
Sunday, August 14, 2011
Once AGAIN!!
Once again for the Billionth time I am so horrible at blogging. I do ok for a bit and then I just stop. It maybe because I do the same thing in my life every day. It's pretty much routine, so I feel like eh why write what I did today when its exactly the same that I did the day before, lol. So ONCE again I am here to play catch up to what has happened in my life. Oh the fun and joyous long blog post you are in for! I will do my best to not make it OVERLY long, but no promises!
So my life has done a 360 and then some. I am now a single mom (not my choice at all) :( thats just a long, sad and painful story. So the short version to how I became a single mom is this. Husband came home from a work trip, said he wasnt happy and wanted a separation. He didnt like how I reacted to his suggestion ( I was in complete utter shock, what do you expect?) so now he wants a divorce.
My 2 boys and I moved back to my home, WA and we are staying with my parents. We have been here since this past June. Its been hard for me to deal with all of it but I do have a strong support system to help me through the tough times. I am so thankful and grateful for everyone who is in my life and who is sticking with me as I am going through this big life change. My boys are adjusting, I don't expect them to understand at all because they are only 4yrs old and 11months. We are ALWAYS doing something on the weekends so we are keeping busy. Thank you to my family for keeping us busy.
My cousins have kids that are my sons age and my nieces and nephew are awesome with CJ. He LOVES going to family gatherings because he has TONS of kids to play with. I tell you having a big family is such a blessing in disguise.
So with this life change I am going from being a stay at home mom of 4 years to trying to get back into the work force so I can provide for my Children. Its hard with the way the economy is right now. I am not giving up hope at all. I have my goals that I want to reach and I will get to them one way or another. By boys are my driving force when I think the world has gone against me! I am getting help for myself to help deal woth all of this. This is such a HUGE step for me because I think this is my way of accepting that there is nothing that is going to happen between my husband and I. I need to get on with my life and better myself for the boys and I.
My friends that I have and the new ones I have made and the ones I have reconnected with they are freaking awesome! You know I realized that I REALLY lost who I was! I am slowly finding myself each and every day! I have been able to laugh with all my heart and smile with everything in me and mean it! Yes I am going through a LOT right now and NEVER would of thought that I could laugh, smile and have fun. My friends have done this for me. They are slowly helping me find ME!
Everyone in my life is just so supportive and they are each helping me heal through all of this. Yes I have lost some friends because of this whole ordeal but you know what? They were never really my true friends to began with if something like this stopped them from being my friend. I have met new people and they are just as awesome and fit perfectly in my life. Right now in my life I can say that I am truely happy. Ya my situation that I am in sucks big time and I wish this were different or that it could be Aug 2012 already but I am rolling with the punching and brushing nonsense off of my shoulders.
I KNOW that the future is bright for me! I just need to learn to be patient and accept the help that I am getting. I will be there and return the favor and help to each and every person who stood and helped me out in the darkest time of my life! All I can say is that if I didnt have my family or my friends to help hold me on my two feet I don't know how I would of dealt with this. The future for my boys and I are bright.
I hope this wasn't to long. I will do my very best to keep this updated a little bit better. Til Next time!
So my life has done a 360 and then some. I am now a single mom (not my choice at all) :( thats just a long, sad and painful story. So the short version to how I became a single mom is this. Husband came home from a work trip, said he wasnt happy and wanted a separation. He didnt like how I reacted to his suggestion ( I was in complete utter shock, what do you expect?) so now he wants a divorce.
My 2 boys and I moved back to my home, WA and we are staying with my parents. We have been here since this past June. Its been hard for me to deal with all of it but I do have a strong support system to help me through the tough times. I am so thankful and grateful for everyone who is in my life and who is sticking with me as I am going through this big life change. My boys are adjusting, I don't expect them to understand at all because they are only 4yrs old and 11months. We are ALWAYS doing something on the weekends so we are keeping busy. Thank you to my family for keeping us busy.
My cousins have kids that are my sons age and my nieces and nephew are awesome with CJ. He LOVES going to family gatherings because he has TONS of kids to play with. I tell you having a big family is such a blessing in disguise.
So with this life change I am going from being a stay at home mom of 4 years to trying to get back into the work force so I can provide for my Children. Its hard with the way the economy is right now. I am not giving up hope at all. I have my goals that I want to reach and I will get to them one way or another. By boys are my driving force when I think the world has gone against me! I am getting help for myself to help deal woth all of this. This is such a HUGE step for me because I think this is my way of accepting that there is nothing that is going to happen between my husband and I. I need to get on with my life and better myself for the boys and I.
My friends that I have and the new ones I have made and the ones I have reconnected with they are freaking awesome! You know I realized that I REALLY lost who I was! I am slowly finding myself each and every day! I have been able to laugh with all my heart and smile with everything in me and mean it! Yes I am going through a LOT right now and NEVER would of thought that I could laugh, smile and have fun. My friends have done this for me. They are slowly helping me find ME!
Everyone in my life is just so supportive and they are each helping me heal through all of this. Yes I have lost some friends because of this whole ordeal but you know what? They were never really my true friends to began with if something like this stopped them from being my friend. I have met new people and they are just as awesome and fit perfectly in my life. Right now in my life I can say that I am truely happy. Ya my situation that I am in sucks big time and I wish this were different or that it could be Aug 2012 already but I am rolling with the punching and brushing nonsense off of my shoulders.
I KNOW that the future is bright for me! I just need to learn to be patient and accept the help that I am getting. I will be there and return the favor and help to each and every person who stood and helped me out in the darkest time of my life! All I can say is that if I didnt have my family or my friends to help hold me on my two feet I don't know how I would of dealt with this. The future for my boys and I are bright.
I hope this wasn't to long. I will do my very best to keep this updated a little bit better. Til Next time!
Monday, May 9, 2011
Mother's Day Weekend and Day 3
Well Happy Be-lated Mother's Day to all of you Mommies out there. I didn't get on this weekend because I was very busy! The In-laws came down which was really nice. Friday my husband, the boys and I went to the Relay for Life. I had a wonderful time out there. We didn't stay to long because it started to get to cold for the boys so we headed out.
It was really nice, they had things for children to do there. I think their theme was Halloween so some booths were doing trick or treating for the kids, CJ had a blast and Jamison was just enjoying some chill time! Then we headed home and waited for Grandma and Papa to get to the house. CJ was very excited because he had been waiting for a few days.
Saturday- was such a LONG day for me. Mr. Jamison decided to wake up at 7:30 and WOULDN'T go back to sleep. He was teething really bad that night, poor bugger boy! Hubby went into work for a bit to finish up something. So while we were waiting for him we took off to have some Breakfast, yummy! Then off to go do some shopping. Long day so far. I know I said that I was going to work out on the weekends no matter what. Well I didn't work out at all! I did something to me knee on Friday and it was killing me all weekend long. It was not fun at all.
So Saturday night the hubby and I went out with some friends while Grandma and Papa watched the boys for us. We had a great time. Chuck's Friend is going overseas here soon and we went out to have a good time with him before he left. It was nice. I watched them do some karaoke.
It was a fun night. We didn't get home til 3am! We have not stayed out that long in Such a long time! The time flew by because of all the laughing and fun we had.
Sunday- Mother's Day! I got a lovely wake up call from CJ with a pinch on my nose and a Time to get up mommy! LOL! I didn't complain and I got up. I had some cleaning to do as we had plans for our friends to come over for a Mother's Day Bar-b- Que. We cleaned and cleaned. I got a gift, wanna see it?
Two boys in a box! LOL. They had fun in the boxes and stayed in there for awhile! Then CJ took off with Grandma and Papa for the week! Little turd! We didn't get to fall asleep til 3am because we just couldn't. Stay up til about 1am playing trivia pursuit, which was fun but good gosh I need to learn some things lol.
So we are now caught up with the weekend and its Monday! Blah. Its really quiet! I didn't want to wake up but Jamison wouldn't sleep in past 8:30. I dozed off and ya he feel off the bed! So we got up. He has been knocking his head all morning long! He has given himself a bump on his head and a cut on his cheek. He has battle wounds to say the least right now. I Forced myself to do my workout. I NEED to do this! I made it through. I had lunch which was left overs from yesterday, lol. Well I am done and I am off of here.
See you tomorrow!
Saturday- was such a LONG day for me. Mr. Jamison decided to wake up at 7:30 and WOULDN'T go back to sleep. He was teething really bad that night, poor bugger boy! Hubby went into work for a bit to finish up something. So while we were waiting for him we took off to have some Breakfast, yummy! Then off to go do some shopping. Long day so far. I know I said that I was going to work out on the weekends no matter what. Well I didn't work out at all! I did something to me knee on Friday and it was killing me all weekend long. It was not fun at all.
So Saturday night the hubby and I went out with some friends while Grandma and Papa watched the boys for us. We had a great time. Chuck's Friend is going overseas here soon and we went out to have a good time with him before he left. It was nice. I watched them do some karaoke.
Sunday- Mother's Day! I got a lovely wake up call from CJ with a pinch on my nose and a Time to get up mommy! LOL! I didn't complain and I got up. I had some cleaning to do as we had plans for our friends to come over for a Mother's Day Bar-b- Que. We cleaned and cleaned. I got a gift, wanna see it?
So we are now caught up with the weekend and its Monday! Blah. Its really quiet! I didn't want to wake up but Jamison wouldn't sleep in past 8:30. I dozed off and ya he feel off the bed! So we got up. He has been knocking his head all morning long! He has given himself a bump on his head and a cut on his cheek. He has battle wounds to say the least right now. I Forced myself to do my workout. I NEED to do this! I made it through. I had lunch which was left overs from yesterday, lol. Well I am done and I am off of here.
See you tomorrow!
Friday, May 6, 2011
Day 2- Jillian Michaels
Well, let's just say that I DIDN'T want to work out. My body was a little bit sore from yesterday. As much as I did not want to work out I did it any ways. I need to believe in myself that I CAN complete this 30day shred. I am making myself have NO CHOICE. I want to look and feel good about my body when I go see my family in WA at the end of June.
I let CJ watch a little bit of TV before I did my workout. I was on the phone with my best friend and so of course I was not going to work out while on the phone that would be interesting if I had, lol. It was very nice talking to my friend, we go months and months without talking and then went we do we just pick up where we left off. So as we were talking my whole wanting to lose weight came up of course, lol. She had mentioned the HCG Diet. Any of you all heard of it? Sounds interesting. I am going to give it a try, hey if it works it works, right? So I will be trying that out along with my 30day shred. I really want to shred this weight BAD.
My work out was a struggle today but I made it through it. My 7month on was climbing on me when I was doing the floor exercise and of course CJ was jealous and had to join in. Try doing crunches with both boys on you. Oh ya not fun. Then try to do jumping jacks with a swimming noodle hitting your knees and what not. Ya it was SOOO much fun! NOT! I did work out and made it through. I didn't take a ton of rests. I think I can do this. I will be working out through the weekends so I don't get lazy about it.
Well this is my check in. No I do not have a weight scale so I wont be weighing in. I will do my checks on how I look in my clothes. I do know that I am at a gross 165, very sad but very true! I want to lose 20lbs. That is my goal!
I let CJ watch a little bit of TV before I did my workout. I was on the phone with my best friend and so of course I was not going to work out while on the phone that would be interesting if I had, lol. It was very nice talking to my friend, we go months and months without talking and then went we do we just pick up where we left off. So as we were talking my whole wanting to lose weight came up of course, lol. She had mentioned the HCG Diet. Any of you all heard of it? Sounds interesting. I am going to give it a try, hey if it works it works, right? So I will be trying that out along with my 30day shred. I really want to shred this weight BAD.
My work out was a struggle today but I made it through it. My 7month on was climbing on me when I was doing the floor exercise and of course CJ was jealous and had to join in. Try doing crunches with both boys on you. Oh ya not fun. Then try to do jumping jacks with a swimming noodle hitting your knees and what not. Ya it was SOOO much fun! NOT! I did work out and made it through. I didn't take a ton of rests. I think I can do this. I will be working out through the weekends so I don't get lazy about it.
Well this is my check in. No I do not have a weight scale so I wont be weighing in. I will do my checks on how I look in my clothes. I do know that I am at a gross 165, very sad but very true! I want to lose 20lbs. That is my goal!
Thursday, May 5, 2011
Starting Fresh
Its been SUCH a long time since I have blogged! I can't believe it! Life is normal and I am forgetful so really no excuses. My shop has it spurts of taking off with orders and slowing down. I hope it gets more business. I have had my fan page open for a year now and my shop really going coming close on its year mark.
Anyways, I am going to try and do my best and start fresh with this whole blogging and everything. I know there are a ton of people who don't read this but I guess its just more of an online journal because I am sure my husband would just be bored to death hearing what I have to say lol. So I get to bore you if you read the whole thing!
The beginning of the year I had wanted to do the Jillian Michael 30 day shred. I started it then stopped and started and stopped. I am not losing any weight nor and I gaining but I can't fit into any of my clothes and its sad and depressing. Last night was my 4yrs wedding anniversary and as a gift I had told my husband to take me clothes shopping. He did and that was very sweet of him to let me drag him around while I found clothes that fit. Well to say the least I HATE shopping right now. One I don't like the shirt size I have to get to fell comfortable in. Its the biggest shirt size I have had to get in such a long time. I am so not even going to go with the pant size. I am sad at what size I am.
I need something to motivate me. I have no energy and no real desire to want to work out. I Just want to wake up one morning and Poof be skinny. Yes, I know I am dreaming don't we all wish it could be that easy? I mean its possible if I had the $$ to go get lipo but ya that is so not happening. I think a lot of this debbie downer has to do with the birth control I am on as well. Yes I like that I don't have to remember to take a pill every day but GOSH I have so many of the side effects. Its seriously effecting me and I know it. I am not happy about it. I go in on the 18th to talk to the new dr about it. I hope I can get it taken out and go back on the pill and start feeling like my normal self again.
So last night I was talking to my husband about giving myself a reward for sticking to the 30day shred. Yes its going to be a BIG challenge for me. One it's not fun working out with a 3 1/2yr old who is up in your face and then trying to not step on your 7month old who is crawling lol. So this is what I want to get myself IF I can complete this challenge and lose some weight.
This dress is pricey just like the swim suit but I love it! So these are my motivation! I just hope it really works for me. I would love to look good for the summer and for the quinceanera as well. I am tired of being disgusted with my body. Its sad and I want to cry. So I hope these two items really help motivate me to work out and look good and to help me feel better about myself.
Well thanks for reading my ramblings! I will keep you updated on my progress. I did my work out today and now its time to do my house chores.
Anyways, I am going to try and do my best and start fresh with this whole blogging and everything. I know there are a ton of people who don't read this but I guess its just more of an online journal because I am sure my husband would just be bored to death hearing what I have to say lol. So I get to bore you if you read the whole thing!
The beginning of the year I had wanted to do the Jillian Michael 30 day shred. I started it then stopped and started and stopped. I am not losing any weight nor and I gaining but I can't fit into any of my clothes and its sad and depressing. Last night was my 4yrs wedding anniversary and as a gift I had told my husband to take me clothes shopping. He did and that was very sweet of him to let me drag him around while I found clothes that fit. Well to say the least I HATE shopping right now. One I don't like the shirt size I have to get to fell comfortable in. Its the biggest shirt size I have had to get in such a long time. I am so not even going to go with the pant size. I am sad at what size I am.
I need something to motivate me. I have no energy and no real desire to want to work out. I Just want to wake up one morning and Poof be skinny. Yes, I know I am dreaming don't we all wish it could be that easy? I mean its possible if I had the $$ to go get lipo but ya that is so not happening. I think a lot of this debbie downer has to do with the birth control I am on as well. Yes I like that I don't have to remember to take a pill every day but GOSH I have so many of the side effects. Its seriously effecting me and I know it. I am not happy about it. I go in on the 18th to talk to the new dr about it. I hope I can get it taken out and go back on the pill and start feeling like my normal self again.
So last night I was talking to my husband about giving myself a reward for sticking to the 30day shred. Yes its going to be a BIG challenge for me. One it's not fun working out with a 3 1/2yr old who is up in your face and then trying to not step on your 7month old who is crawling lol. So this is what I want to get myself IF I can complete this challenge and lose some weight.
I want to get this swimming suit for the summer which is literally around the corner. Its cute and I know that my body won't be ready for a two piece any time soon. I wasn't lucky enough to get the body that goes back to normal after a baby, lol. This swim suit will be the MOST expensive I have EVER gotten myself but HEY if I stick to the work out I think I deserve it, right?
Another reward that I would like to get myself is a dress for my niece and sisters quinceanera. I found the perfect dress that I would like to wear. Their colors are lime green and a hot pink!
Well thanks for reading my ramblings! I will keep you updated on my progress. I did my work out today and now its time to do my house chores.
Sunday, December 19, 2010
Christmas is just a hop, skip, and jump
I don't know where the time has gone! I will say that it sure has flown by so quickly. Like I blinked my eye and BAM its 6 days til Christmas! This time of year is generally hard for me with being so far from my family. I have gotten better over the years but it's still hard no matter how many years its been. The last Holidays that I spent with my family was in 2004 I believe. It was the Christmas right when I got back from my deployment. So its been 6 years away from my family during the Holidays. I have been home to visit around the holiday but never on the day. One year we will all be there to spend the holiday with them.
Let's reflect back on 2010.....January we moved out here to VA. I was very nervous and scared all at the same time. I had to keep saying "you make the best out of what you get" in my mind many times. I have never been one to make friends quickly because I am shy or for some reason people find me intimidating. We had found out we were pregnant with baby number 2 and the morning sickness was starting to kick my butt. I didn't know any body and I could tell that CJ was just getting restless of not being able to do anything with other kids. So when the weather warmed up a bit we would go out in the little back yard area and play. He made friends with the neighbor kid right behind us, how I wish I could so easily make friends like kids can do. Anyways I tried to talk to the kids mom and be friend. For some reason unknown to me it just didn't work. She didn't seem like she even wanted to talk to me, like I had a third eye on my forehead or something.
Time went on and of course I got bigger. I finally got tired of not know how to get around here. I love google maps, lol. CJ and I went to a park and low and behold I met a lovely lady named, Paula. Her kids were so nice and so was she. We started talking and what not, great lady. Of course with my luck and meeting awesome people I found out she was pcsing in like 6wks or so. Then I met another lady and we met once in awhile she live clear across the other side of the Hampton tunnel. Then we just lost contact with each other. Cafemom has been a savior for me when it comes to meeting people. I had a lovely lady, Wendy, create a new group out here as she was moving and wanted to meet new moms in the area. The group is awesome and I have meet some lovely ladies and I am so ever grateful that she made the group and it became active. CJ loves all his new friends as so do I. Great woman and kids! Everyone I have met out here I adore! They are all the greatest.
Some where along the lines I decided to be brave and open up an online shop. I did and I am very excited and proud of it! It is my baby just like my boys. It is still new and ya I haven't gotten tons of business but I have gotten some! I just need to get my name out there and find the people who love handmade and will buy handmade and understand all the work that goes into it. I cant wait for the new year to come, I have great plans for the shop. I have gotten discourage but I know it will get better with time, I just need to stick with it and believe in it.
We added our lovely addition to our family, our second son! I just can not tell you how much I love that little boy. I never knew my heart could grow so much bigger and some much love is filled in it. At first trying to deal with 2 kids was hard, now I think I have the hang of it. My life is good and I love where I am now. I couldn't imagine it any other way. I am so honestly thankful and grateful that my husband and I took the chance of being together. We have a wonderful family. I just cant put into words how much I love my family! I just want to squeeze them all with so much love! It could be that I love to just see the two little boys that my husband and I created. Knowing that they have family who love them just as much as we do and would do anything and everything for them.
Oh yes and my mom got to come visit the East Coast for the first time. She came here to help with my Jamison and CJ. It was the best week ever and I didn't want her to leave. When she left it made me realise how much I really do miss my family. It saddens me because they don't get the chance to watch my boys grow up because we are military and are always moving every 3 yrs or so. I take as much pictures as I can for them so they watch them grow up through photos. CJ knows who his Tia's are and his Uncle and he remembers things for our visits that I wouldn't think he would remember. I just wish we were so much closer. We got to take my mom out to DC as well. She had a great time and so did we.
We sold our house which is a great relief. So many things have happened this year for us and maybe that is why it has flown by. I cant wait for the new year to start. I have so much planned with the shop and family. I plan on helping CJ out with stuff to get him ready for school, we are going out to WA at the end of June for my sister and nieces birthday party, and getting things for the shop.
To those who are moaning and groaning about going to families this holiday please be happy and grateful that you are close to them. There are some Military and Civilian families that are far from their families and would love to be there to spend the holidays and make new memories with them. I just wanted to wish you all a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year.
Thanks for reading this!
Let's reflect back on 2010.....January we moved out here to VA. I was very nervous and scared all at the same time. I had to keep saying "you make the best out of what you get" in my mind many times. I have never been one to make friends quickly because I am shy or for some reason people find me intimidating. We had found out we were pregnant with baby number 2 and the morning sickness was starting to kick my butt. I didn't know any body and I could tell that CJ was just getting restless of not being able to do anything with other kids. So when the weather warmed up a bit we would go out in the little back yard area and play. He made friends with the neighbor kid right behind us, how I wish I could so easily make friends like kids can do. Anyways I tried to talk to the kids mom and be friend. For some reason unknown to me it just didn't work. She didn't seem like she even wanted to talk to me, like I had a third eye on my forehead or something.
Time went on and of course I got bigger. I finally got tired of not know how to get around here. I love google maps, lol. CJ and I went to a park and low and behold I met a lovely lady named, Paula. Her kids were so nice and so was she. We started talking and what not, great lady. Of course with my luck and meeting awesome people I found out she was pcsing in like 6wks or so. Then I met another lady and we met once in awhile she live clear across the other side of the Hampton tunnel. Then we just lost contact with each other. Cafemom has been a savior for me when it comes to meeting people. I had a lovely lady, Wendy, create a new group out here as she was moving and wanted to meet new moms in the area. The group is awesome and I have meet some lovely ladies and I am so ever grateful that she made the group and it became active. CJ loves all his new friends as so do I. Great woman and kids! Everyone I have met out here I adore! They are all the greatest.
Some where along the lines I decided to be brave and open up an online shop. I did and I am very excited and proud of it! It is my baby just like my boys. It is still new and ya I haven't gotten tons of business but I have gotten some! I just need to get my name out there and find the people who love handmade and will buy handmade and understand all the work that goes into it. I cant wait for the new year to come, I have great plans for the shop. I have gotten discourage but I know it will get better with time, I just need to stick with it and believe in it.
We added our lovely addition to our family, our second son! I just can not tell you how much I love that little boy. I never knew my heart could grow so much bigger and some much love is filled in it. At first trying to deal with 2 kids was hard, now I think I have the hang of it. My life is good and I love where I am now. I couldn't imagine it any other way. I am so honestly thankful and grateful that my husband and I took the chance of being together. We have a wonderful family. I just cant put into words how much I love my family! I just want to squeeze them all with so much love! It could be that I love to just see the two little boys that my husband and I created. Knowing that they have family who love them just as much as we do and would do anything and everything for them.
Oh yes and my mom got to come visit the East Coast for the first time. She came here to help with my Jamison and CJ. It was the best week ever and I didn't want her to leave. When she left it made me realise how much I really do miss my family. It saddens me because they don't get the chance to watch my boys grow up because we are military and are always moving every 3 yrs or so. I take as much pictures as I can for them so they watch them grow up through photos. CJ knows who his Tia's are and his Uncle and he remembers things for our visits that I wouldn't think he would remember. I just wish we were so much closer. We got to take my mom out to DC as well. She had a great time and so did we.
We sold our house which is a great relief. So many things have happened this year for us and maybe that is why it has flown by. I cant wait for the new year to start. I have so much planned with the shop and family. I plan on helping CJ out with stuff to get him ready for school, we are going out to WA at the end of June for my sister and nieces birthday party, and getting things for the shop.
To those who are moaning and groaning about going to families this holiday please be happy and grateful that you are close to them. There are some Military and Civilian families that are far from their families and would love to be there to spend the holidays and make new memories with them. I just wanted to wish you all a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year.
Monday, October 4, 2010
SooooOOOOOOooo......
I am no longer pregnant...WOOHOO!! Which means that I now have TWO kids, which I am STILL trying to get use too! I can't believe I am a mother to two little boys. They are my world and I love them so very much! My sleeping schedule is all wacked because of JJ but I still need to be up and mobile for CJ. So I'll tell you the story of the day we went in to have baby JJ.
Morning of Sept 21st 2010 the hubs and I wake up at 5am to get ready. We leave the house at around 5:30am and get to the hospital like 15min before 6am. We check in and let them know that we are there for our scheduled C-section. They have us wait in the waiting room, which at that time was alright. At about 7am they call me to the back to check on my vitals and on the baby. Everything was good. I asked the nurse when I was going to be called back and they told me in about an hour, which would make it 8am. So I go back out to the waiting room. Time comes and goes and still I have not been called back. I am so uncomfortable from sitting in the uncomfortable chairs and of course tired! I am getting pissed and so is the hubs. We keep asking when we are getting to the back and I keep getting the same damn answer, in an hour. Finally hubby had it and gave them an ear full. FINALLY at 10:30 we get called back. Mind you I have had nothing to eat since dinner the night before.
I couldn't believe how long it took them to get me back there! I was just so upset and tired all I wanted to do was cry! I was so happy when they called me back. I was more relieved because I could FINALLY be comfortable. I was very anxious to have the baby and was upset for having to wait. I get all hooked up to the machines and the IV is in with fluids going. The baby monitor is on me and I can hear the baby as well as see when I am having a contraction. We have the Dr come in, the anesthesiologist, and the head nurse come in for me to sign paperwork. Here I am all happy and waiting to go back to the OR.
So we head back to the OR at who knows what time. I didn't check the clock to be honest I was just excited to get it over and done with so I could eat some food and meet my baby! They take me to the OR and Hubs has to stay back for a moment. They will get him after I am all prepped. So I am in the OR I get my spinal done and OMG that works so quickly! I am numb from nipples down and I cant feel anything but just pressure. I am starting to get a little anxiety because my hubs isn't there yet. Before I went back I had to take this drink for heartburn and OMG it tasted so gross. Well with that being the only thing in my stomach and me starting to have anxiety and starting to feel like I am going to pass out I end up throwing up. It was so nasty. After it was all out of my system I felt 100 times better. They finally bring in my husband and I was so relieved to see him. By the time he came in they were already cutting me and getting to the baby. I was talking and laughing while I was laying on the table it was a great time. Then I hear my baby boy cry! I was super excited. Hubs went over to the side where they were cleaning him up and checked him out.
Here is our sons first picture! He weighted 8lbs2oz and 21inches long! My biggest baby! I was VERY surprised that he was an 8lber! So they got JJ all cleaned up and did their quick checks and everything. Then I got to see him for the first time.
I was speechless when I saw my baby for the first time. I didn't know what to say at all. He is so precious to me! It was instant love, love at first site, well more like love at first kick, lol. I finally knew why he was kicking me so much. He was getting to long for my belly, lol. I didn't get to hold him long because he had to go to the NICU to get evaluated and monitored. I was wheeled away to the recovery area! All the people working on my in the OR were amazing and so sweet! They made me feel so comfortable and confident in them! Here I am in the recovery waiting.
After I get out of the recovery I go to my room and they bring in my baby boy. I finally get to hold him and feed him. Yes, of course I was in pain but SOO worth it! To see my baby boy I would go through it all again, with both of my boys! My in-laws came to see the baby of course! They fell in love with him. CJ really didn't know what to think about his baby brother. He did however at one point tell me to put JJ back in my belly, lol. He is so head over heels in love with his baby brother now.
My experience at first at this hospital was not good at all. I was so upset at how they handled things. Once I got in the back everything was better! I was a little scared to go have JJ at this hospital because I had heard so many bad things about it. I will say that I had a great experience and all the nurses and staff where amazing. If you treat them well they will treat you well. I learned that from when I worked in L&D out in TX. They were very good to me.
I also want to say Thank You to my mother in law for coming and watching CJ while I was in the hospital. Thank you to my Mom for coming out as well and being a part of seeing her new grandson so fresh and small and helping me out.
I am sorry this is so long but I thought you all would like to hear my story.
Morning of Sept 21st 2010 the hubs and I wake up at 5am to get ready. We leave the house at around 5:30am and get to the hospital like 15min before 6am. We check in and let them know that we are there for our scheduled C-section. They have us wait in the waiting room, which at that time was alright. At about 7am they call me to the back to check on my vitals and on the baby. Everything was good. I asked the nurse when I was going to be called back and they told me in about an hour, which would make it 8am. So I go back out to the waiting room. Time comes and goes and still I have not been called back. I am so uncomfortable from sitting in the uncomfortable chairs and of course tired! I am getting pissed and so is the hubs. We keep asking when we are getting to the back and I keep getting the same damn answer, in an hour. Finally hubby had it and gave them an ear full. FINALLY at 10:30 we get called back. Mind you I have had nothing to eat since dinner the night before.
I couldn't believe how long it took them to get me back there! I was just so upset and tired all I wanted to do was cry! I was so happy when they called me back. I was more relieved because I could FINALLY be comfortable. I was very anxious to have the baby and was upset for having to wait. I get all hooked up to the machines and the IV is in with fluids going. The baby monitor is on me and I can hear the baby as well as see when I am having a contraction. We have the Dr come in, the anesthesiologist, and the head nurse come in for me to sign paperwork. Here I am all happy and waiting to go back to the OR.
After I get out of the recovery I go to my room and they bring in my baby boy. I finally get to hold him and feed him. Yes, of course I was in pain but SOO worth it! To see my baby boy I would go through it all again, with both of my boys! My in-laws came to see the baby of course! They fell in love with him. CJ really didn't know what to think about his baby brother. He did however at one point tell me to put JJ back in my belly, lol. He is so head over heels in love with his baby brother now.
I also want to say Thank You to my mother in law for coming and watching CJ while I was in the hospital. Thank you to my Mom for coming out as well and being a part of seeing her new grandson so fresh and small and helping me out.
I am sorry this is so long but I thought you all would like to hear my story.
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