Thursday, August 18, 2011

Pinning Overload

So last night one of my best friends and I got into a little argument. It wasn't fun at all and in the end we both were hurting. I hate when I eat my own words. I have always had an issue with getting my words out the right way. I say them PERFECTLY in my head but when it comes to saying or typing them out it goes all haywire. It gets lost in the transaction and in the end I am left hurting because it was not how I  meant it to be said! Then it bites me in the ass! So this is something that I have to fix. Something that hurt my marriage as well. The funny thing though is that people who TRULY know me know that I have a hard time getting my words to come out the right way. If only they could get into my head and read/hear what I wanted to say in the first place.

So I needed to see words of encouragement, words of wisdom, just anything to life me up. Thank goodness for Pinterest. That site is AWESOME! If you don't have an account there you should! Its something new and different. Anyways here are a few saying that really got to me and I will explain.

This really hit me hard last night. This has so much truth to it, it unbelievable. I needed to be reminded that he has control of everything! The part that really got to me was the to leave you part. There is a reason why I am here. He has a plan for me! He is molding me to be the person that he has ALWAYS wanted me to be with the experiences that I need to achieve his goal. I just need to remind myself that every person who is in my life and who has been in my life in the past there was always a purpose where they are with me still or not.

Well I think that I am doing pretty well with dancing in the rain right now! I have found happiness and I have been able to laugh during this situation. I am still learning how to continue dancing in the rain instead of getting swarmed by the storm! Its a struggle at times but the dancing part is amazing. I am surprised that I have been able to dance in the rain and I will continue to learn to do more dancing!

THIS is SO true! This is something that I am learning to do! Its hard I tell ya. Right now I am NOT 100% happy with who I am right at this moment. I feel like I failed at something that I shouldn't have. When I come to accept that this wasn't all my fault I will be much happier. I am on the road to being happy about who I am! I WILL have my happiness back to 100% once again!

In order to love someone else I need to love myself first! When I can love myself again I will be able to give my heart away. Until til I am learning how to love myself once more 100%.

Acceptance! Yes I need to accept what happened in my past and move on. I don't want to because it hurts but in order to move forward I need to. I will never understand the reasoning behind everything that has happened to me in the past. I would NEVER want to change or erase it. My past is what has conditioned and molded me into the person that I am today and the person I will be in the future. I will EMBRACE my past and LEARN from it. If I didn't do that I would never learn from it! So its time to accept it and move on!

This is the last I am going to leave you all with. If he brings you to it; he will bring you through it! This is SOOO true! This is NOT the first struggle I have had in my life. I asked him what he wanted of me and he brought me to it. Even though its killing me inside I know that I will get through it. He will NEVER give me something that he KNOWS I couldn't handle. I am strong and with Him in my life I am even stronger! I will get through this and come out on Top!

These are JUST a SMALL few of the huge list of words that helped me last night. Everything in life happens for a reason and has a purpose. It my hurt so much right now and think that you can't get through it but you will. I know I will get through this. I know that because I am hurting so much I have WONDERFUL people in my life who have brought me so much happiness in this time when I never thought I could laugh or smile! I will get through this struggle. I will be stronger then I ever was before. I will be able to conquer all that is put before me, well at least try for the most part. Thank you for putting me through this. I think this lesson in my life will have a HUGE effect on my future and how I handle things. My life will be so much better because of you.


Julie said...

AMEN!!! God will always be there...he will never fail you!! :) You're a strong woman!!

Athena said...

Jackie, you are such a strong woman!!! I love the way you can see the bright side of your situation even though it may not be easy to do that at times!!! You keep moving forward!! CJ and Jamison are so LUCKY to have such a fantastic mother like you!!!

J.Jones said...

Thank you ladies! I feel like I grow stronger with each passing day!