Sometimes I lay at night in my room listening to my boys sleep while I weep.
Sometimes I ask why me? And wonder if I am strong enough for what is ahead of me.
Sometimes I wonder if I will know when it's time for me to go if it is my time to go at all.
Sometimes I sit and cry for my boys, family and friends who are having to see me go through this.
Sometimes I think about all the what ifs.
Sometimes I forget that I have this evil thing in me.
Sometimes I wonder what I did to have to deal with what I have.
Sometimes I cry for myself. Haven't I been through enough?
Sometimes I feel like my life isn't my life. That it is someone else's life.
Sometimes I look at pictures from a year ago and cant understand how or why it went from bad to worse.
Sometimes I look at these pictures and wonder who the lady is looking back at me is?
Sometimes I wish I was the old healthy me.
Sometimes I forget what lays ahead of me in my journey.
Sometimes I lay in bed and cry because that's all I can do.