Sunday, August 8, 2010

Emotional Overload

I don't know what it is about today but my emotions are just a huge roller coaster. I woke up just fine and dandy this morning. We went to Wal-Mart and got a couple things for dinner and on the way home I was just irritable! I don't know why I was irritable but I just was. When we got home I was still in the mood and then it changed to me wanting to ball my eye out. I am all over the place today and I hate it. I cant control it at all.
So I jumped in the shower to try and cool off a bit and think, get a clear head as to why I like this. I think my consensus is because 1. I am 32wks pregnant to my hormones are all over the place; 2. my 3yr old is mommy whats this whats that?; and 3. I am not near my family and friends. Yes I am a military wife and I should be use to being away from my family. I have been a military spouse since I was 19yrs old and left home when I was 21yrs old. So I haven't been around my family in years. I have my in laws that are three hours away from us but its just NOT the same. I want MY family that close to us. The closest that I have been to my family since I moved out of state in 2005 was TX. TX was still a long ways away from them all the way in WA but it was the closest. I miss them and its going to be another nephew/grandson that they are not going to be around to watch grow up.
I just think everything is just hitting me all at once today. Im due at the middle to end of next month and I just feel everything piling up and so forth. I know that if I was back home in WA my family would be there all the time to help me with whatever. Yes this life was chosen for me, to be a military wife, I wouldn't have it any other way, but you would think it would get easier, right? Ya not so much, you still miss your family. My mom will be coming out when the baby is due and will be here for a week. If it was up to me I'd have her stay for a MONTH! Of course she cant because she has to go to work and has my sisters back home as well to take care of.
Just thought I'd get this off of my chest since its just putting a HUGE damper on my day. Oh ya and I also miss my friends out in TX to so very much. I know that they would be there for me if I was still there. They do try their best to be through the Internet but its not the same as being around them and calling them to tell them to come hang out with me and CJ. I guess I am more of the poor little Ole me stage right now, lol.
Oh ya here is my 32wk picture that I promised.

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